Positivity is felt in every corner of my being. Hope is restored at the possibility of yet another chance that our miracle will find us. Our miracle that I have wanted for so long, now with an amazing husband alongside of me that will seamlessly transition into fatherhood with as much courage, endless love and unconditional support he has found in his heart for myself. We find each other amongst the uncertainty and bravely hold our heads up high until the time comes and we finally see the positive sign that our party of two will finally turn into a family of three.
I am not alone in this new and challenging task. I have found support and encouragement in corners of the world I would never have known existed. Other soon to be mama's have shared their stories of heartache and miracles. With each positive message I receive I draw on the happy endings and focus on what will be in the future no matter how hard the struggles are in the present. I am never alone and find the most amazing sense of comfort in this simple gesture.
When battling Lupus I have to examine every aspect of the disease and how it has tailored itself to me particularly. This allows me to compile a little bag of tricks that I can use to fight my everyday battle. Just when Lupus decides to surprise me I turn around and fight like a girl.......smart, courageous and relentless. As I stand at the bottom of the tall hill that leads me into battle with infertility I feel ready and strong as one foot finds itself in front of the other. It is a small battle in a war I have been fighting for years.
Over the past four months I have stocked a brand new bag of tricks. Tricks that will allow me to be one step ahead of everything and plan each and every battle precisely and methodically. In doing so I have made an amazing new friend at Fairhaven Health. She has guided me towards natural fertility treatments that could possibly help me on my quest for a family. i feel confident in her guidance due to the fact she has taken time to get to know me as well as my Lupus.
With the blessing from my doctor I have started taking two types of supplements: Fertilaid For Woman and Ovaboost. Ferilaid is to help restore hormonal balance to your system so that you have a better chance of conceiving and it aids in optimizing reproductive wellness. Ovaboost will promote healthy eggs in my system as well as protect them from free radicals we may come up against monthly that can harm our reproductive health. Used together my system has a fighting chance of normalizing and conceiving naturally.
After taking both supplements for almost two weeks I have already seen positive changes in my reproductive health. Due to my age, 36, and my Lupus irregularity has been a curse over the last few years. It has made it almost impossible to predict when I am able to conceive. Over the last six months I have had cycles lasting anywhere from 48 days to 78 days being the longest. My greatest hope is to just have my body do what it is naturally meant to do. This month was the only time I was able to test positive for ovulation and it was on day 17.......I am on schedule for a normal 34 day cycle this month!!!!! It is the most important change my body needed to be able to do. This is a celebration all in itself!!!!
I feel increasingly blessed as we go through this next phase of life. Support has poured from every heart that has come across our path. Words of encouragement have been collected and stored in my heart for the moment I will need to be reminded of endless hope. I look into the future knowing that this is a small dot o our path and the journey that starts with two will end with a third. I have prepared myself to root my feet in deep and not run as I am faced with fears around undiscovered corners. Please, if you find yourself thinking as you close your eyes for a restful sleep, send a happy thought towards the desert and it will find us and fertilize the ground we must hold steady to during our struggles to create our very own family.
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