Birthday

Today I am 34. Yes, that is still very young but my body has lived enough for a lifetime! Lupus has taken years off of my joints and muscles and has wreaked havoc internally. I think Lupus thinks it is a party everyday in my little body BUT NOT TODAY!!!!!!! Today is my day to celebrate this magnificent thing called life!!!!!

You see, I am not sad that I have Lupus. I may become frustrated with the disease and the mystery it engulfs me in but sad I am not! I feel my disease has allowed me to live the past 34 years with grace and dignity. It has allowed me to see life for what it really is and the beauty found in everything from a cloud whispering by to a disagreement that allows us to grow. I am able to feel love and accept love whole heartedly because you never know how much time is left. I have opened myself up to change within myself as well as with my surroundings. I wanted to travel the road that has NEVER been taken and see things that only others will dream about! I want to surround myself with unconditional love and support. Most importantly...........I want to have the deepest laugh lines the older I get!!!!!! Yep, you heard it...........I am asking for wrinkles!!!!!!! 

Today I not only celebrate the fact that I have carried on for another year, I celebrate those of you who have  filled my 34 years with so much love, kindness and joy! I am thankful to all of my parents who have had a hand in raising me. My mom and dad are no longer married and I have to say I was never one of those kids who thought that one day they would get back together because if they did they would erase some of the loves of my life! I have a Suzette, Jeffrey, Stephanie, Jared, Dave, Christi, Jenilee, Josh, Jackie, Jamie and Jessica! I have been surrounded by so much love and would never want to have any of them taken out of my life. They are the best parents and brothers and sisters a girl could ever imagine having! I am thankful that my mom Jan and dad Steve have continued to be a positive influence in my life every single day. They chose to bring me into this world and I could not have asked for better parents. I am the one blessed for being brought to them. My sister Holly has been my slobbering sister when she was a baby, my cheer leading/high school partner who would fight with me all the time and who has become my best friend and my true soul mate. She has brought the two brightest angels into my life with Lauren and Mia..............ok, Russ, you are an angel too!!!!!!

Over my life I have had amazing friends come and go. Each of you leaving a mark on my heart that would change me forever. I have learned the true meaning of friendship and have had bumps and bruises along the way. I have been taught lessons in forgiveness and humility and have grown to be a better friend because all of you. You have all become my family and have held my hand in the hospital, sent me sock monkey cookies or emailed me a little something to remind me that I am not alone. The beauty that I feel within is because of all of you. If I am even half the friend that you have all been to me, well, I will be doing good.

While all of you have shaped me and helped me to grow there is one person who wakes up swinging at Lupus with me everyday, he is my Tim. He has been the love that I had never felt and the joy that I never knew existed. He has allowed me to continue living my life with no restrictions. I have seen some of the most beautiful places on a dirt road in the middle of no where because he also has an adventurous soul. The complete love he has shown and the unconditional support is something that I never knew could exist between two people. Tim, you have given me the most amazing gift I could have ever asked for........complete love. You are my best friend, my partner in crime and my love! You have brought the world to me! You have also given me a new family.......Bob, Pat and Chris. They have taken me in and have shown me so much love and I am proud to say that they have become another set of parents to me and a big brother.

How could anyone ask for anything more when my life is filled with so much? Ok, it is my birthday so I will ask for one thing............lets all meet back here this time next year and celebrate 35 years of love and adventure!